Never Too Late

"It is never too late to become the person you might have been." --George Elliot

I love days like today, days that are are cloudy, cold and windy. I love them because they make the inside of my house feel cozier, warmer and brighter. All I want to do on days like this is curl up under a chenille throw on my couch and read a good book and sip hot tea and luxuriate in the yummy goodness of home. And ignore my children and the ringing telephone and refuse to cook dinner and...

Sorry. I got carried away.

I do find it so odd, though, that when the circumstances of life mirror days like this, when the landscape of my existence is dark and cold and windswept, all I can see and feel is the outside. While the stormy afternoon only serves to magnify the warmth and comfort of the refuge of home, the difficulties of life often overshadow the warmth and comfort and coziness that can be found in the refuge of God. Why is that? Shouldn't the dark circumstances of life stand in stark contrast to all the light and comfort and protection of the home we have in the shadow of His wings?

I think it is all part of this process of becoming, this learning to live in oneness with the Lover of our souls. It takes time. And it takes much stumbling and falling and then just as much getting back up and moving forward to change our perspective. When Paul talked of being "crucified with Christ that I might no longer live, but Christ lives in me," (Gal 2:20) he was speaking of this divine perspective, this arduous journey from self-awareness to God-awareness. He longs to be that to whom our gaze is drawn when the storms come, that we might be identified with Him alone and not to the fears that threaten when clouds roll in and the winds pick up.

It is a process. It is a journey. And it is never too late.

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You’re Soaking In It!

Life as I know it has returned to a state of "normal".  I will make no attempts to define "normal", although I usually do enjoy defining the completely subjective because it helps me to bring order to my already cluttered mind.  I am attempting instead to experience moments of life rather than always trying to define them.  As founder and president of the Think Things To Death Society, this is nothing short of miraculous.  Now, where was I?  Oh, yes...
Normal.  We have moved to another state, put most of our worldly possessions in storage and are currently living in someone’s guest home for a loosely determined length of time while we catch our proverbial breath and wait on God to show us what is next.  I'm sorry, did I say normal?  I meant utterly ridiculous but utterly ridiculous is the new normal and so here we are, living on a gorgeous spread of land, complete with horses in surrounding pastures,  swimming pool,  tennis court,  basketball court, workout room, and a beautiful home with every creature comfort possible.  The sheets with the incredibly high thread count are, in my opinion, just the cherry on top.  And if there is a down side to all of this it would only be that there are around a dozen deer and elk heads hanging on the walls in the great room and I swear they stare at me when I play pool in my pajamas.
Oswald Chambers talks about being "put into soak before God".  The innermost life is where the real action is, after all, and there are times when God pulls us away from the shop window, where most church leaders live, to receive, transform, and soften in the quiet solitude of soaking.  I am just amazed at where He has us now and so I will be here, soaking and hopefully transforming.  Softening...like in that Palmolive commercial from the 70's.  It is a good day when you can combine serious spiritual content with nostalgic television commercials.  That's why I am here, people.  That's why I'm here.

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Most People are Crappy Listeners (or A Question We Should Ask God)

Most people, it would seem to me, are crappy listeners who are excellent at talking about themselves and completely oblivious to their inability to actively listen to others. If this is a gross generalization, then please forgive my painting with such a broad stroke. I am sure there is a huge colony of people who are excellent listeners, expertly utilizing correct body language and conversational cues, that live in some remote corner of Montana and I just haven't had the pleasure of meeting them.

And if most of us are poor listeners when it comes to our fellow man, then how must we behave when we enter the proverbial prayer closet? Pretty much the same, I would wager. So I ask you this: Have you ever gotten alone with God and asked Him this: "What do you want to talk about today, Lord?" (cue the sound of crickets chirping)

I decided to challenge myself with this and I have been asking Him to take the lead in our time together. It is astounding what comes out of this type of interaction with God. It won't lower your cholesterol 20 points or shave ten pounds off of your waist, but it will increase your vision and improve your hearing. And your heart? Well, it will be more tender than you could ever imagine. Go ahead...ask Him.

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In His Lap

When I was a child and it was my weekend to be with my daddy, I couldn't wait to get in his lap and feel his arms squeeze me close to him. Nobody could hug me like he did. The smell of his aftershave and the prickles of his whiskers on my cheek were medicine to my hurting little heart and I drank deeply every weekend that I spent with him, wishing that I could hug him every day. Little boys and girls need the lavish affection of their fathers.

These past weeks, I trimmed away some of the distractions in my life for a while so I could pull in, narrow my focus and curl up next to God. I don't mean this to sound spooky- spiritual or religious. I just mean it for what it is...a little girl who needs more affection from her Daddy and the only way she knows to get it is to cuddle up next to Him.

Somehow many of us become so swept away with the distractions of life that we forget how badly we still need to curl up in our Heavenly Father's lap and drink Him in. And sadly many of these distractions, some of them good things or, even worse, ministry things, become poor substitutes for what our souls desperately need...lavish affection from the only One who knows who we really are.

When was the last time you sat in His lap?

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In The Stillness

Nothing in all creation is so like God as stillness.
Meister Eckhart

Psalm 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God."
When I consider what it means to be still and to know Him as God, I think of the mysteries of the cocoon and the resulting transformation that takes place after a season of isolation, of darkness and of stillness. And none of this "cocooning" takes place quickly but over the course of time. To the casual observer it would seem that nothing is happening. Some may regard being still as idle, unproductive and wasteful, but nothing could be further from the truth. To be still before God is to silence the myriad distractions that life has to offer and to focus on the extravagance of simply enjoying His presence. It is possible in this unhurried exchange that our pressing questions might be answered, our deepest hurts healed and our priorities become realigned, but more often than not, those things just fade into the background and the nearness of God becomes all that we see.

I believe we must be intentional in setting aside seasons to seal ourselves into a "cocoon" where we are forced into stillness and away from distraction. This doesn't have to happen in an isolated retreat setting. It can simply mean cutting out so much of the "excess" activity in our lives for a season. The sole purpose is to spend longer quantities of unhurried time with God, soaking in His Presence and becoming preoccupied with Him and Him alone. This is such a time for me. For the month of August I will not be spending time on Facebook and I will not be posting anything on my blog. I sincerely hope this won't kill my blog traffic and that you will all be here when I return in September, but regardless, this is what I need to do. I am really looking forward to the stillness and when I return, I hope to have some tasty things to share with you all.

Happy August!

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Soulmaking

When a husband and wife come together in the most intimate of connections it is called lovemaking. Love is not actually made in the act of sex, it is merely expressed in a wildly intense way that only God could have imagined. And when each of us joins together in the closest of intimacy with our Heavenly Father, it is called soulmaking. Likewise, the soul is not made in the intimate dance between the Father and child but it is expressed in a wildly intense way that, again, only God could have imagined.

There is an ineffible discovery of soul and self and eternal identity that can only be realized in the tender moments of exchange and connection between Father and child. And the self that is realized is really just the true reflection of Who He is and how He desires His image to be reflected in us. And these reflections of His face in each of us are as unique and different as each snowflake that falls to the earth, not one resembling any other. It is the constantly changing environment within a cloud that makes each snowflake uniquely different and so it is with each of us...our ever changing surroundings cause us to be a reflection of the Father's heart and face unlike any other. This must cause the heart of our wildly creative God to burst with excitement over the endless expressions of His true self that are then possible to be seen and enjoyed in the earth.

However, many of us have been deceived into viewing such exchanges with God in much the same casual way that so many view sex. It is for our own gratification, serving the purpose of meeting a base need in such a way that the heart need not ever be engaged. How cheap and shallow an imitation is this of the deeper reality that He intends for us to know when our hearts are engaged and our souls are brought to life in a fiery, breath-taking intertwining of flesh with the divine. Soulmaking is an incomprehensible union worthy of our pursuit that will move us toward, as Sue Monk Kidd puts it, "recovering all that is lost and orphaned within us and restoring the divine image imprinted on our soul."

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The Glory of Being Alone

"Silence is the way to make solitude a reality"
~Henry Nouwen

When I was a girl, I spent many hours with my grandmother on her front porch watching the rain. Sometimes we would talk but more often than not words were unimportant and instead we would both get lost in the beautiful conversation between the wind and the raindrops. I did not understand in those days how she was schooling me in the art of solitude. All of the mornings I would find her in her breakfast room, sipping coffee and listening to the serenade of the blue jays and cardinals outside of her opened back door, she was teaching me the importance of what Wordsworth called "a wise passiveness."

I have known people who find themselves anything but companionable and I feel so sad for them as I have nearly always enjoyed my own company. This is not because I am anything special, but rather that I was taught at an early age to appreciate, even relish silence and solitude and to seek it out regularly as one might seek time with a dear friend. Sadly, this is a lost art in our current time and with an ever increasing number of distractions and ways to connect with others, this generation has forgotten how to connect with self, which ironically leaves us with much less to offer all the other people with whom we work so hard to connect.

Paul Tillich said that "Language has created the word 'loneliness' to express the pain of being alone, and the word 'solitude' to express the glory of being alone." I long for my own children to know the glory of being alone for it is in that place where we become acquainted with our true selves and can then see the transformation from who we are to who we can become. God's transforming grace can meet us in the contemplative silence with an overwhelming clarity that is unknown in the hustle and bustle of busy living and it is a meeting of unparalleled importance. It is what elevates the leader from good to great, the Christian from shallow to deep and the person who is alone from pain to glory.

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How Do You Measure?

How do you measure the worth of what you do for God?

Do you count the number of souls you have won?

Do you count the number of trips you have made to the nursing home or the prisons?

Do you measure it by the growth you see in the life of the one you are mentoring?

Do you measure it by the positive feedback you receive from those to whom you minister?

Is it measured by the amount of your private giving and secret service to others?

Is it measured by how you feel about what you do to serve God?

Oswald Chambers had this to say about it:
"The measure of the worth of our public activity for God is the private, profound communion we have with Him." (emphasis mine)

I have to agree with him. And I cannot get away from this verse that I have quoted so many times.

"I don't want your sacrifices, I want your love. I don't want your offerings, I want you to know Me." Hosea 6:6

And so I ask myself, "Am I giving Him what He wants?"

Are you?

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Where Freedom Is Found

This is a picture that my Daddy took recently while standing in his backyard on the St. John's River in St. Augustine, Florida. It would have been pretty beautiful to have one Bald Eagle land on his dock, but two, well, that just doesn't happen every day.

Or does it? Actually, the American Bald Eagle, our National Emblem signifying our freedom as a nation, mates for life and so, if you pay attention, it is not unusual to find two together. I love that. Because Jesus mates for life with His Bride and, if we pay attention, He can be found near His Bride. Near you. And near me. I love that our Father in Heaven is with us always. And because He is our freedom, it, too, is with us always. Sometimes we just don't see it. We lose sight of Him and Who He really is. But because He loves us so desperately, He will land beside us, His mirror image, and remind us that the freedom we wrestle with was already extravagantly paid for and ours for the taking. Freedom wasn't won on American soil in one quick battle...it took our forefathers much sacrifice and many years. And though our freedom in Christ has already been won, it takes years sometimes to see it, to embrace it, to live in it fully. And it is worth every moment. Don't throw down your hat and walk away defeated, friend. If you have been searching for freedom in an area of your life and you just don't see it, cease your striving and land somewhere and wait. And when you turn your head and look, you will find it right beside you. He is there. He is always there.

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Social Media: How Much Is Too Much?

Our Adversary majors in three things: noise, hurry and crowds. If he can keep us engaged in "muchness" and "manyness," he will rest satisfied. --Richard Foster

We live in an era earmarked by the most astounding technological advancements of all time. The winds of change in this arena over the past three decades have been nothing short of a whirlwind. What is most remarkable about all of this change and development is the sense of connection to others it has brought us. And while our ability to click a button and connect with one another across the globe through various social media most certainly has its merits, there are pitfalls that should and must be considered.

As wondrous as Facebook, Twitter and iPhones are, it is imperative that we do not allow the "noise" of these portals of community to drown out the quiet voice of our own souls and the solitude that the soul craves. Richard Foster wrote about the importance of solitude in his book "Celebration of Discipline", and it is a practice that we are in danger of losing in our hyper-connected world. We used to have quiet moments to think, reflect and still ourselves throughout the day; waiting for our dining companion in a restaurant, in the carpool line at your child's school, in the library, at the dentist office, in traffic, sitting in a coffee shop, or even while using the bathroom! But now we can Twitter, Facebook, read blogs, check e-mail or talk on the phone anytime, anywhere. Does everyone really need to know what you are doing all day every day? Could it be that we miss out on some "living" when we spend so much time "reporting" on our lives?

Please do not read into this that I am against any of these things. I do, however, think we must be very careful to control the place that these "connections" have in our lives. Silence, solitude and quiet thought is essential to our well-being, to our growth and health as Christians and as human beings.

So, ask yourself-
Are you more "connected" than you should be? When was the last time you connected with....you?


"I love people. I love my family, my children . . . but inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up." -Pearl S. Buck

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Come Aside...

I read recently that the Chinese pictograph for "busy" is two different characters: heart and killing.

This is reason enough to take a look at your life and evaluate how you are living it.

Are you doing as Jesus instructed?

And He said to them, "Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while." -Mark 6:31

Sabbath, or rest, is the womb where His words to us come alive and we are transformed.

And where our hearts come alive.

Is your heart dead or is it alive?

Are you "coming aside" to rest or are you pushing rest aside that you might get more accomplished?

There will be those in your life who choose not to rest and call it a "good work ethic." Do not let their dead, busy lives overshadow your own. Work hard and then come aside.

Come aside for rest and for a heart that lives.

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Lend Me Your Ear

I was out on a date this past weekend with my husband. We went to Outback Steakhouse for two reasons: my husband's love affair with all things beefy, and we had a gift card. You just can't argue with free. As we were sitting there waiting on our food to come, I was thinking about all of the sounds that were bombarding my ears. Televisions were playing ESPN, music was playing loudly, people were talking and laughing, and cell phones were ringing. And then I thought about what mealtime must have looked like one hundred years ago. The clink of silverware on china, polite conversation....hmmmm.....that's it. What a noisy, busy, overstimulating world we live in.

A favorite author of mine, Sue Monk Kidd, has invested considerable amounts of time reading contemplative literature and making regular monastic retreats. She speaks about the "monk" who lives within herself who "craves the depths of solitude and silence". I get that. My soul cries out for solitude and introspection and time for observation of all things commonplace and ordinary that, when carefully inspected, reveal the glory and magnificence of a creative God. However we live in a point in time that is punctuated by potentially unending, mind-numbing stimuli. Television, internet, ipods, cell phones, music piped in to every store and restaurant and now there are iphones that enable us to have all of these things in one handy, distracting little device. I find no fault with these wonderous technological advances, I just think that we have to work that much harder at practicing the discipline of solitude which is as essiential to the well-being of the soul as water is to the body. And so many people grab hold of these distractions as a way to avoid facing the emaciation of their hearts and souls. A steady stream of noise drowns out the cry within for something significant, something substantial, something.... missing.
Be sure you are making time to hear. You will find that there is a roar deep inside if you will just put the shell up to your ear.

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A Little Known Fact...

Did you know......that you can rip off the top part of your Razor flip phone and it will still receive incoming calls?  You will not know who is calling nor will you hear the caller, but you can shout word fragments into the phone as if the caller were deaf and they will be able to hear you and perhaps even laugh at you.  Just ask my friend, Sharon.  It is freakish and strange, sort of like when you cut the head off of a snake and it still slithers through the grass as if nothing has happened.

As I considered this, I had an epiphany.   When my screen goes blank and I cannot hear the voice of God, when it seems that He has changed His digits without sharing them with me...He still hears me.  He still hears me.  It is so very comforting to know that He still hears me.  And He still hears you.  It doesn't matter how things appear or what is missing or even if damage has been done.  He still hears us.   For all of time, He has been waiting to just hear each of us call His name.  And His "to-do list" for us is so simple.  Hosea 6:6 "I don't want your sacrifices; I want your love.  I don't want your offerings; I want you to know Me."  To know Him and to be known...that is life's greatest ambition and, oddly enough, a little known fact.

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Twenty-Four Hours In The Pit of Despair

Have you ever allowed yourself to mentally descend to the lowest place possible?  Have you ever given in to despairing thoughts and let all of the hope that usually wraps up your every day just go right down the toilet?  The past twenty-four hours have been that for me.  I don't even understand quite how it happens and so yesterday afternoon, when I found myself alone for a few hours, I gave myself a good talking to and reminded my heart that God WILL do what He said He would do. Regardless of how circumstances appear, He hasn't brought me to this place in my life to leave me and forsake me or the dreams that He has promised would come to pass.  If you are struggling with hopelessness or despair, I pray that you would find courage and hope in Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and  hope."  I send this encouragement out to you, not from a high and lofty place of having it all together, but rather from the dusty road of pain and doubt and learning to live in the moment.  I am really glad that I am not all alone on this journey....love you, my bloggy friends!

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The Depths of Abiding

To abide means to stay; remain; wait patiently for; remain in one place or state; rest satisfied with. Wow! How many of us rest satisfied with God? It would be easy to thrust your hand up and say, "I do, I do!!" Really? I think many Christians would say they know God and relate to Him on varying levels throughout the days, weeks and months of their lives. However, being in relationship with God and abiding in Him are two different realities. As I ponder this, I can think of just one person I know who exhibits the tell-tale signs of true abiding. This dear woman is in her eighties and is a giant of a Christian. She truly lives moment-by-moment in a bubble of His Presence. In fact, I have never known her to leave it. She rests satisfied with Him in a way that arouses a voracious hunger in me to know the very same. I have known Him for 25 years, but abide in Him? I am sad to say that those moments of true abiding, of the prevailing awareness of Him above all else, well, they are few and far between. But I am heading there! My gaze is set on the land of abiding, where the only shadow is that of the Almighty. To stay there, unruffled by the winds of circumstance, waiting, remaining, sojourning, resting satisfied...it is His high call.

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