Friday Jumbles

--Chronicles of Charmia: Epilogue...I went to Walmart (see below) this week to buy toilet paper and lo and behold, what did I see in the middle of the aisle? A HUGE display of Charmin multipacks....on sale. Then the heavens opened and the angels sang and a blue bird landed on my shoulder. Okay, not really, but it could have happened. It had to be a sign from God and right now I could use one.

--I went to Walmart again this week and rather than take the first cart available, I gave it to the older lady that came in the door right behind me. My good deed for the day. I then took the next cart for me to use and I PROMISE YOU....two of the wheels were broken! I am going to have to shift the percentage up from last week to approximately 84%. Moral of the story: Nice girls finish last due to a broken-down buggy.

--Important quote of the week: It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This is why it takes several million sperm cells to locate a female egg, despite the fact that the egg is, relative to them, the size of Wisconsin. --Dave Barry

--My sons were discussing breast implants in the van earlier this week. We passed a Curves gym and my youngest thought it was a place to get breast implants (or boob jobs as he so eloquently put it). He then began a monologue about how interesting it would be to have an implant in your forhead to make you look like an alien. He said it would be called a "freast". I can only imagine what he will become when he grows up...boggles the mind.

--If you are considering buying a new fragrance for the man in your life and you have thought that the new Tim McGraw cologne might be nice, please lie down until this urge passes. Eddie sprayed it on himself (without smelling it first, mind you) in the store the other day and we had to ride home with the windows down. One of the boys even gagged. I think this was just for effect.

--I was driving around town the other day and I got behind a truck that had a bumper sticker that read, "TURD". Now I ask you, what would possess a person to put that on their vehicle?? Is it a southern thing? Should you really need a passport to come down here? You can't even find anything like that in a country song on the radio! Just one of those things that makes you say, "Hmmmmmmmm."