Saturday, November 7, 2009

Being Spontaneous Makes You Ugly

It has been eleven days since I last posted anything and I just have to say that my newfound freedom to be a total is so freeing. Please know that I have not been wasting my time. I have been doing many important things, like staring out the windows, daydreaming and trying to figure out how to get my new Georgia driver's license without admitting how much I weigh. The folks at the Florida DDS are not near as nosy as they are here in Georgia. So I did what any self-respecting southern woman would do. I lied. And I don't care who knows it.

They showed me, though. The picture they took was unspeakably hideous. To be fair, that could have had something to do with the fact that my grossly infected left earlobe was bloody and swollen from twenty failed attempts at putting in my earrings. And the fact that I had food in my teeth and was wearing my finest pair of yoga pants with a t-shirt and sweat jacket. I am nothing if not elegant and well put-together.

In my defense (like I need one...sheesh) I had no prior warning that a trip to the Georgia State Patrol office was in my immediate future. My husband just showed up and said, "Hey, let's go get our Georgia drivers licenses." That very moment presented me with the choice to be one of two things for my man: flexible and spontaneous or well-groomed and attractive. So I opted for spontaneity. I should only regret that decision for the next five years or so until it is time to renew the darn thing. My only request is that if you see me, do not ask to see my license. It will not bode well for you.

Miss Spontaneity


Erica November 9, 2009 at 7:52 PM  

I do not have this problem with my driver's licenses. They come out perfectly lovely. However, my student ID's are a whole 'nother story. This last one I had taken is so unspeakable that I shudder every time I have to take it out of my wallet...which is at least twice a day. Ick. Ick. Ick. I feel your pain!